The Bonds Of B-Movie Queen Michelle Bauer

Michelle Bauer is known as July 1981's Penthouse Pet, for her work on the Playboy Channel, and, after auditioning for Fred Olen Ray, as a queen of scream for her roles in B-films such as The Tomb, Vampire Vixens from Venus, and Dinosaur Island.



You might be more familiar with her from the campy Cafe Flesh -- shown here in a relatively clean (but O-so-fun!) clip:



But did you also know she was Pia Sands, legendary in retro bondage films?




When the B-film career took off, she was getting divorced and he then filed a lawsuit requesting she not use his last name, Bauer, for her films. In 1988, for Hollywood Chainsaw Hookers, she tried using the name Michelle McClellen (McClellen was the last name of her second husband), but the press continued to use Bauer, and so her first husband eventually relented & consented.

She also worked under the names Pia Snow and Kim Bittner, and when you add up all the titles, it's pretty clear to see she did perform in more than the trashy topless films she is generally interviewed regarding -- and note that bondage films like Rope Burn didn't make her barefacts list.

(Most of Bauer's bondage films are available in DVD compilations -- for fans and collectors, see this page on how to match feature titles with current bondage film compilations.)

In fact, she's bared more & dared more than she actually admits to in interviews. Like in this interview at Evil Dread, where Cafe Flesh is mentioned, but as you can see, is downplayed greatly:

Did you have a limit as to how far you would go?

Michelle Bauer: I know when I was doing the men's magazines, I was married to Mr. Bauer at the time and he preferred that I did not do any layouts with men for the stills. So I refrained from that. There's maybe, if anybody looked and searched , there's only very few magazine layouts that I did with another guy. It was all with other women. And then when I got into the B movies it was just an occupational hazard. You had love scenes with guys and you had love scenes with girls. And full frontal was a requirement. I you weren't gonna do it somebody else was gonna. You were defeating your own purpose if you weren't. You completely trusted the people you were working with and working for. No one was going to ask you to do anything out of the ordinary other than act like you're making love to this guy. Okay, I can do that. No I never had a problem with it.

And then there's the back-peddling...

During your career you've acted mainly in B movies. Have you ever wanted to break into the mainstream and become the next Meryl Streep as an example?

MB: I don't think that's possible. First of all, I don't think I'm good enough. Second of all, I wouldn't want things in the past that I've done, that I'm ashamed of, to come out and I know that they would. I think that's hindered me and kept me back from ever wanting to pursue that. I just don't think I have the ability. I don't have what it takes.

According to this interview, Michelle had announced her retirement from film. And the photo below is of Bauer at at 1990's Chiller Con (click the link and read the comments as they are priceless). The "going out of business" signs are ominous, aren't they?



Or maybe that was just a sales ploy. Because she's been in films as recently as 2008 -- and in 2006 under the McClellen moniker too. Perhaps another try at rebranding? Well, not if 2004's Tomb of the Werewolf is any indication.


In the film she plays Elizabeth Bathory (Countess Erzsebet Bathori, who killed 612 women -- and documented the death of each).

Here's what one reviewer had to say about the film:

"Tomb of the Werewolf" is about breasts. Naked female breasts. It is not about a Tomb or a Werewolf. There is a wolf man running around but he's just filler until the next breast scene.

And that's a good review -- from a fan of Bauer, boobies, and Bauer's boobies.

But if the film doesn't seem to give Bauer her acting due, it's even worse for poor Bathory who was supposed to get her film revenge in Tomb of the Werewolf by her 14th cousin (16 times removed), Fred Olen Ray. I guess Bauer fared better than Bathory.

And Bauer's bared better.