A Vintage Bumper Crop Of Boobies

This promo piece (measuring approximately 13.5 x 11.25 inches when fully opened), dating from late 1940's to early 50's, was from "your electrical contractor", and boy is it a hoot -- err, about hooters.

A Bumper Crop
by Sample Simon

Emil J. Weber
Your Electrical Contractor
San Francisco

I WANDERED IN THE GARDEN

I love fruit and in my time, I've
sampled varieties from many lands
and every clime.

In this little brochure I present hard,
but happily-won knowledge, some
gained on the campus, but none in
college.

Sample Simon

Then, once you lift the flap (you have to -- boobies beckon!), you get a billboard warning:

DO NOT
LOOK INSIDE

PROCEED ONLY AT YOUR OWN RISK

Apparently you, like I, are only more determined to see what our favorite electrical contractor, Mr. Weber, has selected to show us -- specifically, that which Simon has sampled.

Opened all the way we see 17 sketches of women whose breasts are clearly visible beneath clothing -- each depicting a specific form of produce...

Apricots I love or not --
Depending on what they've got.

Oranges so round--rich in Vitamin C
Are good for the vision.

Crab apples -- if not too green
Are a marvelous treat.

Cranberries -- every one really is
A delectable bite.

Give me luscious PLUMS and
Let me dream!

Nature with man her goodness shares
In the succulent PEARS.

Those ripe red CHERRIES
Hold hidden dangers.

Prune is a little flirt!
Gets in jams and desserts.

X-??? An experimental fruit
Yet undeveloped.

Cucumbers look harmless but --
Are they?

Cocoanuts--It takes plenty of paring
To reach this treat.

Many states of PEACHES fine.
But I'll take Georgia's any time.

Avocados are quite all right
For the "educated" appetite.

Honeydew I love to eat
Cause it's so naturally sweet.

Grapefruit is very "calorifc"
And big ones are terrific.

Watermelon -- AH.........
So big -- so satisfying!

Pumpkins -- when they're round and
Firm they're best of all.

After all...

Variety -- They Say --
Is The Spice of Life

So is vintage sexist advertising. *wink*